I recently wrote a list of red-flag warnings for women about menand I promised equal time to help men. Woman have brought men misery, ecstasy, and everything in between for millions of years, and that is not likely to change anytime soon.
The only way men could possibly make it through the dating scene in one piece is to learn the art of how to choose a woman who is most likely to enhance his life over the long haul, avoid the ones who are purveyors of pain, and I am here to help.
Being therapist and a woman, I have seen dysfunctional females in action, and I know what they do and how "Red flags when hookup a divorced woman" think. The madness happens when some poor man enters the picture like a hungry fish in a lake.
He swims up, bites the hook and ends up in the frying pan all in a very short period of time. The sad thing is it could all be prevented if guys would approach women differently - with a skeptical attitude where trust is gained over a significant period of time.
I think two years of dating will tell a person 90 percent of what they need to know. Instead, what I see too often is a man falls head over heels in love and gets himself in too deep, too soon. Before his heart has palpitated a dozen times, the part of him that loves to rescue and fix kicks in and he makes plans to remodel her house, buy her a car, pay for some plastic surgery, and take her on some cool vacations.
Men tell me it makes them feel good and needed to help a woman with her problems, but as soon as the paint is dry on the last room in the house the dream may well become a nightmare as he realizes Miss Wonderful is really a crazy train wreck - come on, you know it happens!
So DO NOT quickly move in, get married, make capital purchases for her, pay her bills, do more for her than change a light bulb or buy anything together including puppies, kittens and other items difficult to divide or leave. If you do these types of things before a woman is attached to you, she will associate you with what you can do for her rather than who you are and how she feels about you.
So in my role as a public servant and educator, I am providing a list of red flag warnings that will help men sort out the women who aren't sincere.
To make things easier, I have divided the red flag issues into different departments The P stands for party. Feels most comfortable in bars and loves staying out late with friends. People who don't party are "boring. Has never been independent.
Has relied on parents, family, boyfriends, husbands or divorce settlements to get by.
May work but hates it. Has little or no interest in education, training, or a career.
Prays nightly for a man who believes a woman shouldn't work. Sadly, at the core, it's a confidence issue. You can see by her expensive presentation that she is into the finest material goods and experiences money can buy. Obsesses about fashion, vacations and has her cosmetic dentist, skin specialist and plastic surgeon on speed dial.
Being vain is her thing. Oh, and do you have a yacht?