When you looked into his eyes, nothing human looked back at you from them. Not dead in the sense of hopeless or resigned to his fate, but just that nothing that loved light and warmth ever looked out from behind those eyes. Running into the guy in a dark alley would not be scary. But it scares me that there are people like that out there.
Sociopaths and psychopaths I can deal with. I understand them, psychologically. I see where they fit. But this guy was just something else, like the inversion of a person. Was infinitely more worried after that.
Eyes like Charlie Manson.
We walked the track together. He was one of those cool uncles that always had weed and looked like a character from Sons of Anarchy. One time he stopped by and I smoked a joint with him on the back porch, he just went off with this long and detailed confession about killing someone. For probably close to 20 minutes he told me how back in the 80s he and some friends purposely gave a woman that snitched on them uncut dope. It was disturbing, he even talked about getting mad because she shit on the floor as she was dying.
A few weeks later I found out he was dying of colon cancer. He always wore a suit and tie and would always talk about 4chan and the anarchist cookbook. I had talked to him a few times and even ate lunch with him once or twice. As an eighteen year old it really fucked with me. Knowing this person could have very well had murdered me that night is horrifying.
My dad is probably the most jaded person I know, I have never seen him intimidated by anyone. When he was retelling this story, he got a really scared look on his face. He had recently been caught, and was temporarily being housed in the prison my dad worked at.
My dad was assigned to him, and after meeting him, he refused to ever go near again. There were these women that would visit him and bring him things, and they always looked terrified.
But this man was so manipulative and effective with speech that they were completely under his control. He had this way of speaking and getting inside your head that made you feel powerless and like you had to rely on him.
My dad said that out "World s most intimidating man in the world" all of his years in law enforcement, to this day that is the only time that he felt like he was in the presence of someone truly evil. After I said that, he looked at me and his face lit up and gave me a hug. This hug felt like I just walked into a jail cell and there was Bubba waiting for some fresh meat.
After he lets go, we have a conversation mostly about me being in the Air Force that lasts for maybe 5 minutes. There were points in the conversation where I thought he was about to whoop my ass. He was held back a year in high school, well more like he was in jail for a year for beating someone up badly.
Anyway, I had a couple classes with him and he was one of those guys who felt zero remorse and did not care or think about consequences.
This was over 20 years ago and I can still remember the blank look in his eyes when he talked to you. He looked like a poster child for the navy sailor. Just a broad mustached dude, he was built like the bulldog from Tom and Jerry, just a huge guy. Also one of the nicest guys I ever met.
I asked him for tips as he was making Char and he showed me how to properly sharpen a knife. Eventually he started telling stories and people asked what he did to get so big. Those stories are true. Sure enough the next morning I see him literally roll out of his hammock land on his chest and start pounding out pushups. I was about 6 years old.
We saw a Volkswagen Beetle on the side of the road with their emergency flashers on and a rather good looking guy as my mom describes him with his arm in a sling waving us down. My mom pulled over being the kind of woman that would help anybody in need and he looked normal.
Mom rolled down her window and asked if she could help and the guy asked my mom if she could help him get the last lug nut off his tire so he could change his flat. My
World s most intimidating man in the world said something about his smile really made her uncomfortable and then she noticed that he was missing the passenger seat in his beetle.
So she rolls the window back up and said she would call a tow truck to come help him at the next city. Then speeds away while looking in her rear view mirror she sees him taking off the sling and getting back in the beetle and took off very fast in the opposite direction. One night he beat her really badly because he was jealous that she loved their baby daughter, and the things he said to her just made my skin crawl.
He would make her and the kids stay home all the time with the curtains shut, because he believed that if anyone saw her then they would have an affair with her. Such a charming smile, and fairly good-looking. It just sort of accentuated the feeling of uncanny monster-ness about him. I called the police on him one too many times and they got evicted. No one did a thing to help her or the kids. They were dating and when she tried to leave him, he killed her. We had all met him, he seemed like a completely normal and down to earth dude.