It is easy to over-think your behavior when dating a military woman. The best advice is to be yourself and try not to act any differently. However, as the relationship gets more serious, there are definite aspects of civilian-military relationships that are unique. You need to learn to accept every aspect of your new relationship, especially the periods of distance.
As gender roles are in a Dating a girl in the navy of change, learning the basics of what you can expect from a relationship with a soldier is more important than ever.
Treat her like you would anyone else. Put yourself in her shoes. She has a high profile job that creates stereotypes about her personality. Obviously, she has her own personality just like anyone else.
Active service members and veterans get a slew of strange and somewhat uncomfortable questions from civilians. Some inappropriate, or at least annoying questions may be: Did you kill anyone?
Do you have PTSD? Did you see anybody die?
Did you get shot at? Male-female relations are in a period of transition. Adding the expectations and stereotypes of military women can make this more confusing. The best way to act around military women is simply not any different.
Be yourself and be respectful.
Men dating a military woman shouldn't feel the need to act more masculine around her. Avoid talking about the politics of war. If you disapprove of any and all war, dating Dating a girl in the navy in the military is a recipe for disaster. Going out of your way to praise servicemen and women will sound like you are just trying to kiss up to her. In this case, however, avoid making overt statements of approval or disapproval with the military.
The best way to behave naturally is to acknowledge something obvious to both of you, if needed. She is a female soldier. You are a civilian. This is a new and strange dynamic that has not been common in American culture thus far. If you would feel more at ease mentioning this up front, she will likely respect your honesty. For example, you might say something like: Accept this part of your relationship. If your girlfriend is career military, long-distance dating may become a regular part of your relationship.
You will have to make peace with her being away, and recognize her service to the country. If you love her, it is likely that her sacrifice is part of your attraction. Stick to normal hobbies. If you normally go out to bars, keep doing that.
Since this may become a regular part of your relationship, creating stability between times she is here and away is important for both of you. It helps her imagine where you are day-to-day, and helps you cope with her absence. Send her phone cards. One of the best ways to wow your military girlfriend or wife is to make it easy for her to communicate with you and others. Call or video chat. Modern technology has made long-distance relationships much more bearable. Calling on the phone is the bare minimum, and video chat is better.
Being able to see each Dating a girl in the navy in your respective environments helps you picture each other. Seeing each other helps you keep track of little details, like hairstyle changes.
Facial expressions are also a better indicator of feelings than voice alone. Making the house uncharacteristically neat or forcing yourself to wake up much earlier than normal will be an uncomfortable adjustment for both of you. As always, be yourself. After all, she chose to date someone who is not in the military. Accept that her temperament may have changed.
Many women who return from the military, and even active duty, act more masculine. This may make your relationship dynamic different than it was before deployment. She may slowly return to her former civilian personality, but accept her as she is. After all, you are not going to be the exact same person either. You are trying not to change yourself around her — let her do the same. It is common for returning veterans to be more aggressive than they were before deployment.
This applies to women as well. As long as there is no physical or emotional abuse, give her space to readjust to civilian life. This is a natural component of her chosen career. This does not mean joining in with her. Wrestling Dating a girl in the navy physically fighting with her may start playfully and become much worse.
Gently let her know if her aggressiveness is getting out of hand or becoming unwelcome. Giving her space does not mean tolerating actual abuse.
Even though she probably realizes it, let her know you are always happy to listen. Veterans who start bottling up their feelings early after discharge are setting a precedent for avoiding communication that will be hard for them to break.