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Now they pretty much only hang out together. We used to do everything together the three of us. Over the past year or so most of my other close friends moved away. I slowly weened off contact with my other "friends" who I realized weren't actually good friends.
These guys were the only 2 people left that seemed to genuinely care about me at all and wanted me to be part of their lives. I really enjoyed just having a small "trifecta" like that They pretty much only hang out together now.
They go to all the places we'd have gone to with the three of us. Most of the time they don't invite me along anymore unless its like a big group of people going out.
I talked to my one friend about how I was feeling a bit 3rd She apologized and said she'd tried to do better. Since then its actually gotten worse. I know I know. Still feels like shit. Whats the point in becoming close friends with people if they're just going to leave you in the dirt at the earliest convenience?
I won't say they're bad My best friends started dating, they're behaving perfectly normally, but it's a shitty situation nonetheless.
Sounds like you know the next step - make new friends. Maybe you'll make a girlfriend and can expand your trifecta to quartet. The other shitty part is that when I was with the three of us, I finally started dating again. It gave me confidence knowing I had that support network to reassure me I was still someone worth hanging out with, and to fall back on if things went south with the dates.
Now that I have nobody, I have so little motivation to find someone. And as far as making new friends Just feeling crappy all around. But you still have that support network. Right now it feels like you haven't because they are your only means of social contact. Expanding your circle will allow both you and them some more space. They're a new couple, they need some serious alone time. I get that it sucks for you but it's best in the long haul to give them some space now to enjoy each other, and once things settle down a bit and everything is not so new anymore, they'll have more room for hanging out the three of you again.
Been looking into it actually.
I'm self-insured on a high deductible plan so can't really afford it right now, but its one of my priorities. When exactly did they start dating? If it's just recently then it's normal that they will want a lot of time just the 2 of them. As time goes on imo they should want to hang out with you more. I hang out with my best friend and his girlfriend all the time and am never made to feel like My best friends started dating third wheel.
It's just what good friends do.
They are in the "getting closer" part of their relationship, of course they need time alone. If you continue your unreasonable expectations, then you should count on being completely dropped as "that overly needy
My best friends started dating. I mean, they are bad friends. Insomuch as they're not his friends any more. Friends don't get worse than that. I'm getting downvoted but I don't get what's so controversial about 'dumping your friends because you have a new love interest is a shitty thing to do'.
It may be common, doesn't make it less shitty. This sub seems to think that any romantic relationship, even a brand new one, is more important than any other relationship, even a long-term friendship.
But you can fully enjoy "My best friends started dating" romantic relationship without completely ditching your friends. So I totally agree-anyone who does this is an asshole. That is pretty normal actually. Once people start dating, they only basically see each other. After a couple of more months, they will remember their friends and other priorities again.
Some my friends are like this when they first enter a relationship, they disappear off the face of the planet pretty much for a couple of months then they return when their relationship is no longer as new and they remember other people again. Just don't take it personally.
Since you stated that they are good friends, just let it be. They will come around. Also, maybe you can try looking for someone to date? It's nice to have someone of your own to spend time with. If dating is not your thing though, you can try reconnecting with old friends, making new friends, obtaining a new hobby, etc. Yea working on dates. Just a bit hard to get motivated right now to try to get close to someone when I just got pretty much dumped simultaneously by two people I cared a lot about.